


the heart-and-mind tag team

by domeeneec



Category: Chinese Actor RPF, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV) RPF
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Fluff, Freeform, Light Angst, M/M, protect xiao zhan 2020, theyre both good boyfriends, wang yibo realizes he needs his brain to work with his heart to love xiao zhan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:09:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27725297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/domeeneec/pseuds/domeeneec
Summary: “Hey, hey, what’s wrong? What do you want?”Yibo wasn’t sure how to say “I want to scream to the world that I love you and that you’re mine, but I know I can’t because shit isn’t built to accept what we have. I want to drop my brain for 30 fucking seconds just to let my whole heart take over,” without sounding absolutely ridiculous.So he settles for: “A hug. I want a hug.” It was fitting enough.Wang Yibo realizes that for Xiao Zhan, he needs his brain and heart to work together.
Relationships: Wang Yi Bo/Xiao Zhan, Wang Yi Bo/Xiao Zhan | Sean
Comments: 27
Kudos: 304





	the heart-and-mind tag team

**Author's Note:**

> a word vomit , honestly

Wang Yibo always knew what his heart wanted. He also knew that when his heart locks itself to love a very specific thing, he will end up keeping that specific thing close, and as much as possible, he’d _never_ let go. When Wang Yibo loves, he went all out, because why the fuck not? He had nothing to lose, anyway.

This has been his thought process for years. He always believed that he would be able to pull off anything if he ever put his whole heart into it. He never had to worry about who could get hurt because he _knew_ all the worst-case scenarios would lead to _himself_ taking the damage. And being Wang Yibo who had little to no fucks about shit, that never really scared him. If he ever fell, he’d just get up. Then go about life with the amount of passion he usually exerts and see where it brings him. Rinse and repeat.

Considering that, Yibo spent years going about his life with his decisions 100% decided by his heart

* * *

The first time Xiao Zhan kissed him, something clicks inside Yibo—a realization that caught him wildly off guard. There was something in the way his co-star’s eyes shone—so warm, so bright, so _sure_ —that made Wang Yibo think, _oh._

He remembered feeling a rush of thoughts enter his brain, all a mix of emotions— _Love. Excitement. Love. Protectiveness. Love. Fear. Love. Determination._

He remembered swallowing down the overwhelming feeling, lifting a hand to cup Xiao Zhan’s cheek, his mind reeling so violently, he caught sight of his own fingers’ slight tremble. He remembered thinking, _shit._ Because unlike everything else he’s loved in his 21 years of living, he knew this one was different. He knew this one couldn’t compare. He knew this love, with Xiao Zhan, was _the exception_.

That, unlike everything else he’s loved, he needed his heart to work alongside his _brain_ for this one. In order for him to keep it—to _ensure_ he won’t ever let go.

He had let out a shuddering breath at that thought but the longer he stared at Xiao Zhan in front of him, the more he felt his everything get settled. When he leaned once more to plant a chaste kiss on a pair of lips owned by the kindest, most beautiful man he’s ever had the pleasure to love, the last thought in his head was:

_Fuck it. I’d do anything to keep this._

* * *

Having your heart work with your brain to keep something you love was more frustrating than Yibo ever thought. Having the heart work with the brain meant a bunch of frustrating things had to come along in order to keep said love. It meant restraint and discipline. It meant _concealing_. Because even when the heart said “ _I want to see him,”_ the brain always answered with some smart-ass shit like “ _Not yet._ ” What’s worse is that, the brain was right, and Yibo always had to take a moment to let the twinge in his chest die down whenever that happens.

Letting his brain help with decision-making meant he needed to be better at managing time. For years, he always just let himself accept whatever came his way without question. Schedules were set and all he needed to do was comply because he was sure enough he would be able to comply with it. It’s the curse that came along being a member of the entertaining industry.

It wasn’t until Xiao Zhan that he let himself sit down with his manager when it came to schedules. Because even when the heart says “ _I’m ready to drop everything and fly to where ever he is right now,”_ the brain counters with _“You have a schedule to follow. He also has a schedule to follow. You can’t afford to disrupt that.”_ And again, the brain was right. So even when his chest felt heavy, he needed to suck it up. The faster and the more efficiently he gets to manage his work schedule, the higher the likelihood of him seeing his lover, and the mere thought of a reunion was ample fuel to push through it.

* * *

Letting the brain work could be fun sometimes, though. Yibo thought this as he waited patiently for his phone’s time to form a specific set of numbers. Once he clicked on the post button, he let himself stretch, feeling wildly proud of himself. It wasn’t until he received a text from his Zhan-ge—a quick “ _you keep feeding them huh?”_ followed by an “ _i love you too”—_ that he let a giggle bubble out of his chest. His heart felt satisfied. He had to thank his brain for that.

* * *

Xiao Zhan had sent him a text saying he shouldn’t forget to eat. He didn’t notice he was smiling at his mobile until Han-ge gave him a firm pat on the shoulder.

“He’s a good guy, isn’t he?”

Wang Yibo couldn’t help but smile even wider, “He nags me a lot. I nag him a lot too.” The elder smiled back at him, amusement and fondness clear in his eyes, “Be smart, okay, Yibo?”

The younger smiled even wider at that, “I am.”

He was getting a hang of this heart-and-mind tag team thing.

* * *

His manager gave him an exasperated but _fond_ smile as he asked what time it was. It was probably the fifth time he asked. The staff had to forcefully remove his wristwatch because he couldn’t stop looking at it. They said that without it, he would be able to finish filming the commercial much, much quicker. Right now, he was back in the dressing room with his manager for a 15-minute break. She had been updating him about his schedule.

At his manager’s little smile, Yibo couldn’t help the grin that made its way on his face, “ _C’mon!_ I waited really long for this day, jie!” This made the lady shake her head in an endeared manner, “Aiyo. I spent years trying to make you have this type of energy, and this is all it takes? A movie date in your apartment? You even answered the interviews pretty well!”

The idol rolled his eyes, amused, “It’s not just _any_ movie date.”

She then chuckled, “Of course, of course. Anyways, you have an hour left so you better not mess up your shoot if you don’t want to extend.”

Bouncing on the balls of his feet, Yibo let his heart take over his mouth as he let out an excited, “I get to see Zhan-ge in an hour!” Then proceeded to walk out of the dressing room, ignoring his manager’s screeching of, “Not too loud, Wang Yibo!” The warmth in his chest was too strong. His brain can forgive his heart just this time, can’t it?

* * *

A comment on his post had said: “They’re real.”

Wang Yibo nodded to himself, his brain and heart very quietly reiterating it.

_We’re real_.

* * *

There were days Yibo felt secured enough to say he’s used to his new heart and brain routine—the intense management of schedules, his timestamps being planned down to the single minute, the shared wardrobe hints. It was subtle. Like silently screaming. And sometimes, that was more than enough.

It’s been a year and he’s been living with Xiao Zhan comfortably. They’ve established a system that both carried their love and their jobs perfectly, and it’s reached a point where they’ve joked they’re invincible. Their faces were in rankings, pictures all over billboards—their fame _so_ big, it helped overpower secret meet-ups, secret dates. Since their schedules were often full, no one really bats an eye at one-day free gaps, assuming they’re merely rest days.

And well, they weren’t wrong but Yibo preferred to call it _Wang Yibo and Xiao Zhan days_ —where their schedules meet in a certain time and area, and their managers were used enough to book them in the same hotel with fake names _whilst_ booking other hotel rooms with their real names.

On those days, Wang Yibo would wake up to Xiao Zhan kissing his forehead. He’d look at Yibo with bright eyes despite the exhaustion, despite the stress.

But there were also days his heart gets the better of his brain and he would be left staring at the ceiling of his hotel room, forcefully trying to keep his chest calm. These usually happen in days where he couldn’t be with Xiao Zhan especially when he knew his boyfriend needed him the most—in days he knew Xiao Zhan was also all alone.

These were the kinds of days wherein he felt ready enough to just stand up and drop everything he could drop just to be with Xiao Zhan. He felt ready enough to sacrifice everything he built just so he could hold his boyfriend’s hand tightly and be with him through the hate and the pain and the fear. And it sucked. It sucked that during these times, his brain always had to remind he had to listen to his manager. That contacting him would be the dumbest idea because Xiao Zhan’s situation was vulnerable. Adding proof to fuel more hate would be too risky.

His heart would argue during these moments. It would say, _I’m ready, anyway. I can handle it!_

It would add with, _If everything fucks up, I can just find another career. I can do a lot of things. I won’t let myself fall._

And his brain, being the smart-ass that it was, would always fucking sigh at his heart. Sometimes, Yibo felt as though he was starting to get delusional with how he’s started to pertain to these two separately, as though they’re two individual beings. But it helps. It _really_ helps. It keeps himself in check—clearly reminding him to distinguish his wants from his needs.

His brain would say, _This isn’t about just us. If you jump, you pull him along._

It _always_ keeps himself in check.

Wang Yibo would always end up turning the lights on and the television on throughout the whole night when these instances happen. He would stare at the ceiling stubbornly, forcing himself to be patient for any news about the situation.

It was nearly 3 am when he receives a text from Xiao Zhan’s manager. It was a simple, “I know you’re not sleeping. I’m okay. I promise.” And so very obviously _not_ from Xiao Zhan’s manager. Yibo had let out a relieved breath at this, finally able to close his eyes.

* * *

The next time Wang Yibo sees his lover, he couldn’t help but freeze at the sight of him. He cleared all his schedules for three whole days. He begged his manager to just let him stay with Xiao Zhan—to let the both of them forget the world even for just a short period of time.

His manager had looked at him sympathetically at that, sighing after a few moments of contemplating his request. She agreed to it a few hours later. Yibo could almost cry.

When Xiao Zhan had finally let him in his apartment, helping him pull off his coat and hat, Yibo couldn’t help the rush of affection that surged through his body. Whenever he was with his lover, his heart would always go haywire, along with his brain.

His brain, being his brain, would be reminding him of mechanics he had to tell Xiao Zhan. It was spurring multiple strings of sentences going from “ _Jie told me we could stay for 3 days together but we can’t really go out,”_ and “ _We can just order take out,”_ and “ _We can probably order some supplies online, it slipped my mind running here.”_

His heart, though, would be reeling. It would say “ _I’m finally here,”_ and “ _You’re finally here,”_ and “ _Fuck the world, we’ll stay here forever,”_ and “ _I love you so much.”_

It didn’t occur to the younger man that he had been staring until his boyfriend had smiled at him, eyes bright and forming the most beautiful crescents—it always made him want to kiss his eyelids, then his cheeks, then his everything. But he could also the dark circles under his eyes, the exhaustion in the crinkles of his smile.

“You okay, baobei?”

Yibo blinked at that.

Xiao Zhan, who was currently the one going through absolute _shit_ is asking _him_ if he was okay. God, Yibo wanted to pull at his hair. He wanted to snatch this man away, carry him onto his shoulder, and lock him in his bedroom, to keep him safe. To keep him safe from the _absolute shit_ he was going through but never deserved. A part of him was laughing exasperatedly inside, almost hysterical, because _fuck_. Was this what Lan Wangji felt? No wonder that little shit wanted to keep Wei Wuxian in Gusu. This was unbearable.

The silence must have started to worry his lover though because the next thing Yibo knew was that Xiao Zhan had both his soft hands on both sides of his face, his thumbs stroking gently at his cheeks. There was a lump in Yibo’s throat that was starting to ache and his boyfriend’s gesture just made it ache even more so.

“Hey, hey, what’s wrong? What do you want?”

Yibo wasn’t sure how to say “ _I want to scream to the world that I love you and that you’re mine, but I know I can’t because shit isn’t built to accept what we have. I want to drop my brain for 30 fucking seconds just to let my whole heart take over_ ,” without sounding absolutely ridiculous.

So he settles for: “A hug. I want a hug.” It was fitting enough.

He knew it was fitting enough because both his mind and heart agreed enthusiastically at his sentiment. A hug meant he could have the love of his life in his arms. It meant he could have Xiao Zhan for a few time-stopping moments, and keep him as safe as he can. With a hug, he could let his everything be—let himself be swallowed with love and adoration. He could let himself drown—let the both of them drown in the existence and knowledge and presence of both their undying love. And yeah, it may not be the world _world_ but—Xiao Zhan was _his_ world.

It was definitely fitting; he now fully decides.

It was silently screaming. But for today, it could be enough.

Very carefully, he pulled his boyfriend into his space by his waist until both their fronts were pressed flush against each other. He then let himself run his hands on his lover’s back, gently stroking at it, before burying his nose on the crook of his neck. Their height difference always made this position perfect. Yibo absolutely loved it.

Xiao Zhan seemed to have been caught off guard by his sudden request and action, but after a few moments of freezing, he responded right away, lifting his arms even more so to wrap it around the younger’s neck, one hand stroking the back of Yibo’s head, his fingers playing at his hair.

It was quiet. It was comfortable. It was perfect.

With an inhale, Yibo pulled away slowly, locking eyes with the most beautiful man to ever exist.

Xiao Zhan smiled again, somewhat soft, somewhat fond, somewhat amused.

Yibo’s heart and mind say: _Fuck, I’m so in love_. And before he knew it, he was smiling back.

“What do _you_ want, baobao?” He returned the question.

And it was at that moment that he realized that his brain could also be reckless sometimes because when his heart had thought out, _I can give you the world,_ his mind responded with _Well, our overall net profit could probably achieve that—maybe an island_. He forced himself not to shake his head and wait for his lover’s response.

He then watched Xiao Zhan tilt his head slightly as though he was thinking hard about it, but the gleam in his eyes and exaggerated purse of his lips (making his cheeks puff, _god)_ meant he already had an answer and just wanted to be _cute_. Yibo truly loved him.

After a few seconds of silence and Yibo trying not to pull him back into a crushing hug, Xiao Zhan flashed him a wide grin, the type that lit up his whole face and basically everything surrounding him.

“I want a kiss.”

Yibo was full-blown grinning now as well, “A kiss?” He raised a brow, a teasing hint to his voice.

“Yeah,” the elder gave a careless shrug, “I was going to ask for a hundred kisses but I’m not sure if Lao Wang was up for that kind of challenge—"

Without letting his boyfriend finish, the younger pulled him close, his chapped lips latching onto Xiao Zhan’s soft ones. And like their first kiss, something inside Yibo clicks again. It wasn’t a realization, though. Just a reminder of what he felt at that time—the one thought that made him jump into the whole heart-and-mind tag team.

_Fuck it. I’d do anything to keep this._

He couldn’t help himself as his hold on his lover got tighter. He deepened the kiss and let himself drown in the feeling. Xiao Zhan’s enthusiastic response only fueled him even more so. He wanted to keep going until they both couldn’t breathe. He wanted to keep going until his beautiful boyfriend felt kissed. So very kissed.

And loved.

So very loved.

It was Xiao Zhan that pulled back first, a giggle escaping his lips. It was Yibo who spoke, though, a grin now playing at his lips, “That’s one. Ninety-nine more to go. We’ve got three days, ge. I’m going way past that quota.”

The older man lets out the most beautiful laugh and Yibo couldn’t help but stare at him in awe. His brain wonders if it was possible for human beings to be _that_ beautiful. His heart, in turn, was thumping, fluttering, doused with the most intoxicating warmth, shouting _you’re more beautiful than all gods and goddesses combined_. He blinked at Xiao Zhan, trying to get ahold of everything he was feeling, when the elder suddenly spoke as well, one hand gently stroking at Yibo’s cheek.

“Hmm. How about instead of ninety-nine kisses, I demand for something else?”

His brain empties. The warmth coating his heart transferred lower and lower and Wang Yibo cackles. He pulled his boyfriend closer, attempting then to lift him off the ground. Xiao Zhan lets out a surprised laugh, holding onto Yibo more tightly as the younger tried to carry him as quickly as he could towards the bedroom.

* * *

Wang Yibo wakes up to bright eyes staring at him. He blinked to himself for a few moments before staring back, a smile tugging at his lips. They were both lying on their sides, face to face. It was quiet and comfortable and Yibo would never trade anything for this.

He was about to greet his lover a good morning when he was cut off by a soft kiss, just a peck.

Xiao Zhan pulled back just as quickly though, flashing him a smile.

“Thank you. For being here.”

Yibo couldn’t help but blink again. His voice was hoarse when he let out an, “Uh. Thank you as well.”

The actor in front of him—looking soft, looking content, looking happy—snorted. He then suddenly closed his eyes, letting out a sigh, “Sometimes. Everything gets too much. Everything just gets all—” he then did a gesture with one hand, waving it as though he couldn’t explain. Then continues, opening his eyes to lock with Yibo’s, “And I just want to stay and hide with you. But that’s dumb, isn’t it? Sometimes, I know it isn’t logical but my feelings just get the best of me—"

“Not dumb.”

It was suddenly Xiao Zhan’s turn to blink, stunned.

The younger then continued, hesitant, “Like. Like your brain and heart’s arguing, right?” He swallowed, “Like, somehow, your heart wants to do something but your brain always just has some shit to say.” He probably couldn’t hide the grimace on his face because suddenly, he was met with a chuckle.

Xiao Zhan was looking at him, obviously amused, but not mocking. It was a comforting. That he wasn’t being laughed at for saying something that ridiculous.

“It’s exactly like that, yeah.”

And with that, Yibo felt as though his everything was about to burst. His heart was once more doused with warmth and his brain was reeling, chanting non-stop about how _he gets it_. He gets it and Wang Yibo isn’t delusional and that Xiao Zhan also has days where his heart and mind would argue. That Yibo isn’t alone in this heart-and-brain bullshit. And that through this bullshit, he has Xiao Zhan with him and—

“ _God.”_ Wang Yibo wrapped his arm around the most beautiful man, peppering his face with kisses. He couldn’t help but smile through it, enjoying the surprised yelp from his boyfriend which in turn shifted into soft giggles then fake protests as Yibo kept doing it again and again and—

“I love you.”

Xiao Zhan’s answering smile was lovely.

“I love you too.”

For the first time in a while, Yibo’s mind and heart settles in comfortable silence together.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading ! kudos and comments would b cool let's b pals i dont have pals in this fandom sad sigh
> 
> i jus made a twt acct !! @domeeneek_ let's be pals! :D


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